If Not The Senate Bill, Then What?

Almost two weeks have passed since the Comprehensive Immigration Reform bill passed the Senate with 68 votes (14 from Senate Republicans). The bill was the product of deliberation and compromise. Roughly a week before the bill passed the “border surge” amendment was added to the original “Gang of Eight” proposal, making the bill a true product of bipartisanship. Senate Democrats got an earned path the citizenship and Senate Republicans got border security (TONS of it).  Now it’s the House’s turn, and there’s no telling what their proposal will look like, or if a bill will even reach the House floor for a vote (see Hastert Rule).  For now, we’ll have to refer to past proposals by right wing reform opponents for guidance.

A is for Alligators:

“We have put a man on the moon, we can build a fence! Now, my fence might be part Great Wall and part electrical technology…. It will be a 20-foot wall, barbed wire, electrified on the top, and on this side of the fence, I’ll have that moat that President Obama talked about. And I would put those alligators in that moat!” -Former GOP presidential candidate Herman Cain

B is for Bird Dog:

“You want a good bird dog? You want one that’s going to be aggressive? Pick the one that’s the friskiest … not the one that’s over there sleeping in the corner.” — Rep. Steve King, on picking good immigrants from bad ones. (I’m not sure this qualifies as a proposal)

Government Subsidized Tacos?

“I don’t care if Mexicans pile up against that fence … just run a couple of taco trucks up and down the line.” — Talk radio host Neal Biarritz

How did Santa get mixed up in this?

“Obama voters chose dependency over Liberty. Now establishment R’s want citizenship for illegals. You can’t beat Santa Claus with amnesty.” Rep. Steve King

Terrorism! Holocaust!

Illegal immigration is a  “slow-motion terrorist attack.” Rep. Steve King

Illegal immigration is a “slow-motion holocaust.” Rep. Steve King

Fertility Competitions:

Jeb Bush, urging conservatives to support immigration reform, stated: “Immigrants are more fertile, and they love families and they have more intact families, and they bring a younger population. Immigrants create an engine of economic prosperity.”

In a speech in which she she took exception to Jeb Bush’s claim that immigrants are more fertile, Sarah Palin declared: “I say this as someone who’s kind of fertile herself.”

The implied proposal (assuming fertility is a serious issue): Visas for immigrants who are more fertile than Sarah Palin

We must reform our nation’s broken immigration system, and until the House proposes a legitimate alternative we’ll have to assume our options are either the Senate proposal, or something involving alligators, bird-dogs, Santa Claus, and taco trucks.  Here’s hoping the House is reasonable and decides to put the Senate bill to a vote.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s